Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Change is in order.

I am in the process of making some changes in my life. Some people may get upset during this transitional stage, but it is truly for the better.

A few weeks ago, my dad had a seizure and a slight stroke and went into the hospital. He had surgery to stop the bleeding on his brain and he seemed to be doing well. Then he needed another surgery to unclog the shunt in his arm for dialysis. It was after that surgery that things started looking kinda grim.

During this entire process, I realized a lot and I am grateful for the lessons. I remember this lady told me some years ago that I tend to value friendships more than others. I knew that but I didn't know how to handle it. I am no longer going to be the anchor in many of my relationships.

My dad's death, along with my friend Shalonda said this " But I do know this much for as long as I've known and interacted with you and your family, you ALL have always opened your hearts and home unselfishly to sooo many!!! You and your family serve as the "rock" too many. If there was anything anyone needed you guys are there jolly on the spot!!! It just hurts so bad because so many go to you all for consoling advice and assistance."

My father's death was so unexpected. There were some people who said some bizarre things to my family and I will never forget that. If you have never lost someone close to you and have to deal with foolishness in the process, you will never truly understand what I'm going through. I am taking time to re-evaluate all of my relationships. The people who call themselves my friend but have never really shown themselves friendly will be eliminated from my life. Those family members who only call or come around when it is convenient for them, are gone. Those males who are always in my face pretending like they really want to be with me but during this time of need, they were M.I.A.

These changes are inevitable and during the process some people may get their feelings hurt; however, I have to do this to maintain my peace of mind. I am only going to nurture relationships that are nurturing to me.