Race does matter.

I was approached by a friend (Amy Fuji) to write this post (for Open Salon) and I am really not sure how to approach this subject. It stemmed from a reply I wrote on Neilpaul’s topic “Black versus White, or Why I’m lucky to be White.” Amy suggested I write about my experiences as a Black woman in a white world and she would write about being a white woman working in a predominately Black environment. I strongly urge you to read her counterpoint and leave messages for both of us.

I am an educated Black single mother who lives on the South Side of Chicago. If you check the stats, by all means, I should not have a college degree. I should have at least two additional children (by two different men), living in some type of housing development and receiving public aid. Oh, I should have dropped out of high school a long time ago. Well, the reality is this, when I had my daughter, I had completed high school and two years of college. I left the hospital on my 21st Birthday. Some people will say that I beat the odds, but some days I am not too sure.
I am in the process of looking for a home and I often wonder will I be able to achieve my American dream. What most white people don’t realize is, my dream is slightly different from their’s. I am not looking for a white picket fence with 2.5 children (how do you get .5 children, one will never know) and a dog or cat. That is not my dream. My dream is to be able to purchase a nice, affordable home in a decent neighborhood. I would like to get married one day, but the sad reality is many Black men are reluctant to take this step for a variety of reasons. Some of them are fear; fear of failure, fear of commitment, and fear of what their friends will say. Then there are some guys who are afraid of marrying a woman who has an education and earns more than he does. You do know there are more Black men in prison than enrolled in college, so the likelihood of me marrying an educated Black man is slim.

I am a strong proponent and supporter of higher education and just because I want my daughter to attend a Historically Black College or University (HBCU) does not mean that I am racist. I know the world is not completely Black. I’m sorry, but I am reminded of that on a daily basis, whether it is directly or indirectly. I think a lot of white people mistake me wanting to be around people who look like me as being unrealistic but it's not. Well, let me tell you this, I know the world is not completely Black and this is not why I am an advocate for HBCU’s. I think the media does a good job of portraying Blacks in a negative light and I think it is important to young children to see otherwise. You do know it was illegal for Black people to get an education and this is how HBCU’s came about. Shame on me for wanting to support these institutions of higher learning, because someone thought enough of future generations to start a school. When many white people sit around the dinner table and discuss their children’s future, I wonder how many of them mention institutions such as Howard University, Hampton University, or Clark-Atlanta University. I also believe that if a lot of white people won't send their children to the public school with my child, why should I pay for her to go to school with them?
I don’t think many white people understand what it’s truly like to be a minority. Oftentimes, I feel like the man in Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man. This unnamed character walks around and is socially invisible to others. See, if you have never experienced something like this, you will never know how it feels. Even if you think you’ve experienced it, imagine if you had to live your entire life feeling invisible. It is not a good feeling and there’s nothing you can do about it. There are times when I am with my white counterparts and they are discussing people/things that I know nothing about or is not relevant to me.

Now as it relates to careers, I have seen countless qualified Black people passed over for promotions and given some lame excuse for it such as"we don't promote within" or "you are over qualified for this position/program." I get tired of people discounting affirmative action and other programs designed to give minorities a chance. Don't mistake my point, I am not suggesting that people be promoted based soley on race, but I do think that there should be some type of opportunity given to qualified minorities. If my personal experiences hadn’t shown me otherwise, maybe I would say eliminate it. When Michelle Obama made the statement about this being the first time in her adult life she was proud to be an American, many white people got mad. Well let me tell you why I understood Mrs. Obama’s plight. Many Black people have to work extra hard to prove ourselves to others. When I turn on the news and read about white police officers being acquitted for killing Black people, why should I be proud of that? When I know I am not welcomed in certain neighborhoods in 2008, why should I be proud of that? How about the many times I have been shopping in a predominately white mall and I am followed around like I am a criminal? Or, the sales clerk ignores me completely? Should I be proud of that? Dr. King had a dream that one day his children would be judged by the content of their character and not by skin color, but how often does that really occur? I get tired of people saying race doesn't matter, but it does. If it didn't matter, people wouldn't say "race doesn't matter."

What do Black people have?

Today I was talking to my sister and she asked me when did this hair salon become a braid shop. I told her that it has been there for a while. That one question sparked another discussion about the number of braid shops that have come into the community. Then we got to thinking about the number of other minorities who have come in to the community and gotten a lock down on every industry.

The Asians (Vietnamese, Korean, and Chinese) have come in and taken over the nail industry. There used to be a time where Black nail technicians worked in the beauty shop alongside the barbers and hairstylists. Now, trying to find a Black nail technician is a rare thing. (Trust me I know.) I know why this is becoming increasingly difficult. Black nail technicians can not and will not compete with the Asian nail shops. First, that isn't their competition. The Asian nail shops are competing with each other. Think about this, if there are nail shops within a few blocks of each other, they will try to out do each other to get you in their chair. Also, we want to look good, but we are not willing to pay the price. Many of my friends who still service clients have a few clients who see the quality of the work they receive, but still feel like they should be paying less.

The next industry is the beauty supply stores. Many of them are owned and operated by Asians also. They have changed the way we do hair in the Black community. Now many of the hair care companies for Black people are owned by foreigners. It is really baffling to me how people with a different hair texture than mine can really tell me about my hair and provide products for it. I am not saying it is impossible, it's just crazy.

Now, I like a greasy spoon every once in a while. There is nothing like a Gyros with a little extra sauce or Italian beef dipped with hot peppers. Every time I enter one of these establishments, the person behind the counter is foreign. Some (if not most) are Arab or Pakistani. The Middle Easterners also have most of the gas stations on lock down. I can't find too many gas stations owned by anyone else.

Of course, the Africans and Jamaicans are holding down the braid shops. Everytime I turn around, there is a braid shop on every corner.

I am always amazed how the foreigners are allowed to open businesses and so many of them when many Black people get laughed out the bank door before entering. I am not knocking anyone's hustle, but let's get real here. If this is the land of opportunity, everyone should have a chance to prosper.

The caucasians have investments, sports teams, media, and just about every other outlet you can think of. They hold the majority of the nation's wealth. Any outlet you can think of and it is probably dominated by caucasians.

Now to answer my question "What do Black people have?" Well, I'll tell you what we have. We have the street corners, prisons, and dropout rate on lock down. When it comes to other races, we rank top in those areas. We also have a higher number of fatherless children and the highest infant mortality rate. We also have the crime on lockdown (see that's how we got the prison
s on lock down). Then you also have to consider that fact that Black women are contracting HIV/AIDS at a higher rate that any other ethnicity. We also have the economic spending on lockdown. Black people hold 2% of the nation's wealth but spend 98% back into the economy. So, think about this: for every $100 Black people receive, $98 goes back into the economy and $2 is kept. This is why you will have a Black people living in the housing projects or subsidized housing and there is a HUGE big screen television in the house. You can afford to have that, but won't work to become self-sufficient.

There are so many other areas that we have on lockdown, I don't have enough time to address them all. The last one I will mention is self-hatred. Some of this self-hatred as well as other issues is not the fault of Black people. It stems from that "Plantation Baggage" that is still plaguing us. You do know that lighter Black were allowed in the house and they were treated a little bit better than the darker Blacks. The lighter Blacks were a result of ol' massa raping the Black women. This treatment started the division between Blacks. Lighter Blacks have and sometimes continue to receive preferential treatment over darker skin Blacks. As I write this, I think about how the media believes "Halle Berry" is so beautiful. Well, is it because she has features that resemble white/European features. What about Angela Bassett, Sanaa Lathan, Gabrielle Union, Nia Long, or Regina King?

I hope one day Black people will wake up and realize that in order for us to become successful, we have to unite for the common good. We won't support one another for anything because we are afraid that someone else will advance before us and that can't happen. We also need to learn how to love self. I think a lot of the issues facing our community comes from slavery. I know some people will say, we need to stop focusing on slavery, but it is a part of history that can't be erased. When the slaves were on the auction block, the men were separated from their families. I think that was the beginning of the fatherless child. It continued on when Black women started receiving public aid, that further perpetuated this situation. If you remember the movie "Claudine", the mom was reluctant to get married because that had an affect on the amount of aid she would receive. As a result many Black men would live there but when the aid workers came around they would leave. Eventually they would take up with another woman and father more children and the cycle would continue.

Ok, I digressed. I really pray that Black people will realize what is going on with our race. The downside to this is the people who need to hear these things are never in the right arena to hear them. Even if they are, they really don't know how to work towards changing.